i've lived in White Villa all my life. and i only have one next door neighbour, and i practically grew up with them, so they're almost siblings to me.
there's a newborn baby in that house, and guess who's fallen in love with the baby girl...?~
:D
:D
she.is.ADORABLE.
AND she sleeps when i dukung her.
AND she's adorable.
*deep breath*
Monday, June 30, 2008
Sunday, June 29, 2008
Suicide Hotline
feeling suicidal? call me. i'll take you for a car ride.
LOL.
Ali : Atiqqq!!! tgk depey!!
Ali : jangey breti!!
Ali : slow.
Ali : jangey tekey break gituh, nati keno tepuh.
sorrryyyy cousie.
LOL.
Ali : Atiqqq!!! tgk depey!!
Ali : jangey breti!!
Ali : slow.
Ali : jangey tekey break gituh, nati keno tepuh.
sorrryyyy cousie.
one afternoon in White Villa,
after i watched Ayahnda tried in vain to tukar lampu kalimantang punye bulb (or whatever ye call the thing) and him letting Mak Som (the cleaning lady) clear up the back yard despite not having anything else to do;
.
.
.
ciri-ciri bakal suami Atiq
10. NOT a spoilt brat from a royal family; educated anak petanis are most welcome.
11. knows how to change lampu kalimantang bulbs.
and WHOA for talking about ciri-ciri bakal suami for the first time AND starting it with number 10, lol.
Atiqah
rindu usrah :(
.
.
.
ciri-ciri bakal suami Atiq
10. NOT a spoilt brat from a royal family; educated anak petanis are most welcome.
11. knows how to change lampu kalimantang bulbs.
and WHOA for talking about ciri-ciri bakal suami for the first time AND starting it with number 10, lol.
Atiqah
rindu usrah :(
truly madly deeply do
(unrelated titles for the win)
Watched Didie in tv3 last night, which was hilarious. sakit tangan kena cubit sebab asyik gelakkan dia, haha. I wondered for a moment, who among my friends would remember to watch it after my constant reminding them. If they know me enough, they'd know that it was a big deal to me. I'm so happy for some reason. Probably happy that at least a few remembered :) and happy that my sisters ask for my opinion in everything, happy for all the love they're offering. Happy that I'm standing my ground in things that matter to me. Happy that my summer will last longer this time.
I drove both the Persona and Wira yesterday. Wooowwwww....dah lama tak drive okay. So I was basically a bane to the other drivers in Wakaf Bharu, haha. Ampunnn...saya budak baru belajar. Both cars were automatic though, so it obviously wasn't that hard. I just need to get used to it all over again. Made Ayahnda go and buy P stickers for me, I can't have crazy drivers himpiting me in traffic ever again, I'd smash them cars in no time.
omg it's raining! yayy!
Watched Didie in tv3 last night, which was hilarious. sakit tangan kena cubit sebab asyik gelakkan dia, haha. I wondered for a moment, who among my friends would remember to watch it after my constant reminding them. If they know me enough, they'd know that it was a big deal to me. I'm so happy for some reason. Probably happy that at least a few remembered :) and happy that my sisters ask for my opinion in everything, happy for all the love they're offering. Happy that I'm standing my ground in things that matter to me. Happy that my summer will last longer this time.
I drove both the Persona and Wira yesterday. Wooowwwww....dah lama tak drive okay. So I was basically a bane to the other drivers in Wakaf Bharu, haha. Ampunnn...saya budak baru belajar. Both cars were automatic though, so it obviously wasn't that hard. I just need to get used to it all over again. Made Ayahnda go and buy P stickers for me, I can't have crazy drivers himpiting me in traffic ever again, I'd smash them cars in no time.
omg it's raining! yayy!
Friday, June 27, 2008
Julia Nunes..
..on YouTube is amazing. she writes excellent rainy day songs. <333
in other news, i taught maths to KuZett and she scored 100% in her mid-terms. i know it's obviously not my doing, but i'm going to insinuate that anyways. hehe.
in other news, i taught maths to KuZett and she scored 100% in her mid-terms. i know it's obviously not my doing, but i'm going to insinuate that anyways. hehe.
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
of my grandfathers, part II
dear blog,
sometimes i write these type of posts, so i'd remember what happened in my life later on. this is because i tend to forget things. when i click through my post history, i already have some posts that i remember nothing of. i hope my readers won't misunderstand my motives. this is both a place for me to ramble and a place for me to log the whats and whens of my life.
Paternal Grandfather : Tokku
Location : Lapangan Terbang Sultan Ismail, Kota Bharu.
I held the door of the green Mercedes open for him as he struggled to get up. Then I walked beside him, pulling his cabin-size wheeled suitcase and holding his cane for him. I put my granddaughter-of-a-very-royal-somebody face on, so that people won't register me as his bibik or something. And I had my nicest outfit on, also for that same reason. The check-in counter was still closed. We walked to the seats and I sat down. He remained standing; no..pacing, more like it. Then he walked away, and when he came back he had this annoyed expression on his face;
"Bakpo Tokku?"
"mmhh...flight delay."
"Aik. FireFly tok hata notification pung?"
He sat down beside me. I stared at his shoes. The shoes caught my attention ever since he walked down the stairs with it on when we were in Ketani. To say the shoes were gorgeous would be an insult.
"Tok rajing tengok pung Tokku paka kasut ni...kasut baru ko Tokku?"
"Tok rajing tengok sebab Tokku tok rajing paka. Baru,"
He smiled; half proud, half sheepish. Then he took it off to show me the brand name printed inside it.
Bally
"Aik. Tokku beli mano kasut Bally? Berapo ni?" I didn't know you can buy Bally shoes in Kelate.
"Free" grins.
"Free? Sapo bagi ko Tokku?"
"Rajo,"
"Tahu pulok saiz kasut Tokku..."
"Samo saiz. Daley almari kasut Tokku tu ado dekat 15 pasey kasut, 2 pasey jah kot Tokku beli. Hok laing semo rajo bui."
He's always suddenly dropping random facts like that and not elaborating them. At least not to me. His royal past has always been such a mystery. I only know bits and parts of it.
Then he proceeded on to tell me of the ways to clean expensive shoes. As if I'm ever going to own one la kan. Nevaar.
"Ku Iz nok mari," he suddenly announced, after talking on the phone with Iz, my cousin.
"Iz? Iz ado sini eh? Habis doh kelas dio?"
"Tok tahu Tokku,"
Around 10 minutes later Iz came, clad in his white uniform. Then Tokku announced that he wants to have lunch; so Iz walked on his left, pulling the suitcase, and I walked on his right, his cane in my hand. I prevented melancholia from evading my senses when Iz and I had to slow our pace to match Tokku's. The days when I would become a patung bernyawa in Tokku's presence because I was so scared of him felt like a million years ago.
Tokku ordered Kuay Teow Soup, and all the while he was eating it, he went on and on explaining the way the Thais would cook the dish.
"Ore siye bubuh kakung jah"
"Ore siye tok bubuh carrot ginih"
"Ore siye bubuh meatballs"
etcetera.
When we went up to the cashier to pay, we were surprised because the sum was only RM18.
"Murohnyo?"
"Hargo staff," said the cashier, pointing at the blur-faced soon-to-be pilot Tengku Hafizuddin.
Maternal Grandfather : Tok Ayoh
I walked into the unlocked house and immediately saw a familiar male figure dead asleep in the middle of the house.
"Aaallliiii...." I called his name to wake him up, but in this creepy soft voice, just because I am an immature 21 year old.
It spooked him alright. His face when he woke up to my haunting voice: priceless.
"*grins* Bilo Ali balik? Tok oyak pung?"
"Baru jah sapa. Atiq mari wak gapo?"
"Temey Tok Ayoh wak check up. Ali balik bakpo?"
"Lamo tok jupo Tok Ayoh,"
Then we walked towards our grandparents' room, to find Tok Ayoh putting on his kopiah, ready to go out.
"Ayahnda gi hata Adik ngaji smeta, Tok Ayoh. Kejap lagi dio mari,"
"Adik ngaji kat mano?"
"SBJ,"
He walked slowly down the three steps and on towards the living room. Ali sat on a chair at the big table and I sat down a few seats away from him. We watched in silence as Tok Ayah came into the room and slowly changed from his house sandals into his outdoor sandals. It was as if the whole world was in slow motion. Ali looked like he was in another realm altogether; I was ready to spring towards Tok Ayoh any time, as I eyed his unstable gait worryingly.
Some time later, the black Wira drove into the driveway. I held the car door open for him as he slowly gets himself on the car seat, and closed the door after him.
He gets on pretty well with the doctor. He never talked that much to me. I was never one of his favourite grandchild anyway. But I was fine with it, because I think he just generally prefer the boys and the little ones.
"Berapo jari ni?"
"So,"
"Okay...ikut jari sayo neh. Jangey gerok palo, ikut guno mato jah"
"mm.."
"Okay...pahtu, try pokcik jaley gi sano, pahtu mari sini smula,"
Tok Ayoh was obviously bemused by the things the doctor asked him to do. When he sat down, he had this half-hearted smile on his face, and said;
"Dulu maso sayo mudo-mudo..sokmo ore tanyo sayo, lorak nok gi mano tu? loni..."
My heart automatically sank.
I sat outside the hospital with Tok Ayoh as we waited for Ayahnda to get the car from the parking lot. Silence was all Tok Ayoh offered to me..but it wasn't an awkward silence. It's a meaningful silence, if that is even possible. It just..had a different aura.
"Tokwe, ni duit cucur daley plastik, ubat ni doktor suruh Tok Ayoh makey duo, tapi kalu tok raso huyung-hayey sangat, makey so jah,"
I didn't notice that Tok Ayoh had silently taken the plastic bag from me as I went on explaining his medications to my grandmother, and only realized this when he suddenly told me,
"Duit ni?"
"Duit cucur saknih,"
"Ambik ko Atiqlah,"
A granddaughter can hope that this is her grandfather's way of showing his affection. I can never know what the gesture actually meant.
- Atiq.
p.s: cucur = baki
sometimes i write these type of posts, so i'd remember what happened in my life later on. this is because i tend to forget things. when i click through my post history, i already have some posts that i remember nothing of. i hope my readers won't misunderstand my motives. this is both a place for me to ramble and a place for me to log the whats and whens of my life.
Paternal Grandfather : Tokku
Location : Lapangan Terbang Sultan Ismail, Kota Bharu.
I held the door of the green Mercedes open for him as he struggled to get up. Then I walked beside him, pulling his cabin-size wheeled suitcase and holding his cane for him. I put my granddaughter-of-a-very-royal-somebody face on, so that people won't register me as his bibik or something. And I had my nicest outfit on, also for that same reason. The check-in counter was still closed. We walked to the seats and I sat down. He remained standing; no..pacing, more like it. Then he walked away, and when he came back he had this annoyed expression on his face;
"Bakpo Tokku?"
"mmhh...flight delay."
"Aik. FireFly tok hata notification pung?"
He sat down beside me. I stared at his shoes. The shoes caught my attention ever since he walked down the stairs with it on when we were in Ketani. To say the shoes were gorgeous would be an insult.
"Tok rajing tengok pung Tokku paka kasut ni...kasut baru ko Tokku?"
"Tok rajing tengok sebab Tokku tok rajing paka. Baru,"
He smiled; half proud, half sheepish. Then he took it off to show me the brand name printed inside it.
Bally
"Aik. Tokku beli mano kasut Bally? Berapo ni?" I didn't know you can buy Bally shoes in Kelate.
"Free" grins.
"Free? Sapo bagi ko Tokku?"
"Rajo,"
"Tahu pulok saiz kasut Tokku..."
"Samo saiz. Daley almari kasut Tokku tu ado dekat 15 pasey kasut, 2 pasey jah kot Tokku beli. Hok laing semo rajo bui."
He's always suddenly dropping random facts like that and not elaborating them. At least not to me. His royal past has always been such a mystery. I only know bits and parts of it.
Then he proceeded on to tell me of the ways to clean expensive shoes. As if I'm ever going to own one la kan. Nevaar.
"Ku Iz nok mari," he suddenly announced, after talking on the phone with Iz, my cousin.
"Iz? Iz ado sini eh? Habis doh kelas dio?"
"Tok tahu Tokku,"
Around 10 minutes later Iz came, clad in his white uniform. Then Tokku announced that he wants to have lunch; so Iz walked on his left, pulling the suitcase, and I walked on his right, his cane in my hand. I prevented melancholia from evading my senses when Iz and I had to slow our pace to match Tokku's. The days when I would become a patung bernyawa in Tokku's presence because I was so scared of him felt like a million years ago.
Tokku ordered Kuay Teow Soup, and all the while he was eating it, he went on and on explaining the way the Thais would cook the dish.
"Ore siye bubuh kakung jah"
"Ore siye tok bubuh carrot ginih"
"Ore siye bubuh meatballs"
etcetera.
When we went up to the cashier to pay, we were surprised because the sum was only RM18.
"Murohnyo?"
"Hargo staff," said the cashier, pointing at the blur-faced soon-to-be pilot Tengku Hafizuddin.
Maternal Grandfather : Tok Ayoh
I walked into the unlocked house and immediately saw a familiar male figure dead asleep in the middle of the house.
"Aaallliiii...." I called his name to wake him up, but in this creepy soft voice, just because I am an immature 21 year old.
It spooked him alright. His face when he woke up to my haunting voice: priceless.
"*grins* Bilo Ali balik? Tok oyak pung?"
"Baru jah sapa. Atiq mari wak gapo?"
"Temey Tok Ayoh wak check up. Ali balik bakpo?"
"Lamo tok jupo Tok Ayoh,"
Then we walked towards our grandparents' room, to find Tok Ayoh putting on his kopiah, ready to go out.
"Ayahnda gi hata Adik ngaji smeta, Tok Ayoh. Kejap lagi dio mari,"
"Adik ngaji kat mano?"
"SBJ,"
He walked slowly down the three steps and on towards the living room. Ali sat on a chair at the big table and I sat down a few seats away from him. We watched in silence as Tok Ayah came into the room and slowly changed from his house sandals into his outdoor sandals. It was as if the whole world was in slow motion. Ali looked like he was in another realm altogether; I was ready to spring towards Tok Ayoh any time, as I eyed his unstable gait worryingly.
Some time later, the black Wira drove into the driveway. I held the car door open for him as he slowly gets himself on the car seat, and closed the door after him.
He gets on pretty well with the doctor. He never talked that much to me. I was never one of his favourite grandchild anyway. But I was fine with it, because I think he just generally prefer the boys and the little ones.
"Berapo jari ni?"
"So,"
"Okay...ikut jari sayo neh. Jangey gerok palo, ikut guno mato jah"
"mm.."
"Okay...pahtu, try pokcik jaley gi sano, pahtu mari sini smula,"
Tok Ayoh was obviously bemused by the things the doctor asked him to do. When he sat down, he had this half-hearted smile on his face, and said;
"Dulu maso sayo mudo-mudo..sokmo ore tanyo sayo, lorak nok gi mano tu? loni..."
My heart automatically sank.
I sat outside the hospital with Tok Ayoh as we waited for Ayahnda to get the car from the parking lot. Silence was all Tok Ayoh offered to me..but it wasn't an awkward silence. It's a meaningful silence, if that is even possible. It just..had a different aura.
"Tokwe, ni duit cucur daley plastik, ubat ni doktor suruh Tok Ayoh makey duo, tapi kalu tok raso huyung-hayey sangat, makey so jah,"
I didn't notice that Tok Ayoh had silently taken the plastic bag from me as I went on explaining his medications to my grandmother, and only realized this when he suddenly told me,
"Duit ni?"
"Duit cucur saknih,"
"Ambik ko Atiqlah,"
A granddaughter can hope that this is her grandfather's way of showing his affection. I can never know what the gesture actually meant.
- Atiq.
p.s: cucur = baki
of things i don't want to know about.
sometimes it's fun catching people red-handed. you get to see them menggelabah and make fun of it later when things calm down a bit. but what if you caught someone doing something you really despise, something you don't really want to know or expect they would be doing, but they act as if it was no biggie, and that they did nothing wrong?
i feel like puking. kepala ni macam berpinar pun ada. rasa nak lempang orang, tapi sabar. sakitnya hati bukan kepalang. nak cerita kat orang tak boleh. in fact, dah lama tak bercerita dengan sapa-sapa apart from my sisters. pasal ni, nak kasik tau my sisters? kirim salam. nak ulang ape yang jadi kat mulut ni pun tak sanggup. macam nak keluar air longkang serba payau instead of words.
sape suruh jadi my blog. padan muka, padan muka. kan dah kena dengar atiq bebel. i can't possibly bore my friends with this. lagipun they'd probably be all 'bagitaula ape jadi...come on, you know you can trust me'. banyakla semua orang punye trust. dah takde hati nak percaya kat orang lagi dah.
okay bai.
i feel like puking. kepala ni macam berpinar pun ada. rasa nak lempang orang, tapi sabar. sakitnya hati bukan kepalang. nak cerita kat orang tak boleh. in fact, dah lama tak bercerita dengan sapa-sapa apart from my sisters. pasal ni, nak kasik tau my sisters? kirim salam. nak ulang ape yang jadi kat mulut ni pun tak sanggup. macam nak keluar air longkang serba payau instead of words.
sape suruh jadi my blog. padan muka, padan muka. kan dah kena dengar atiq bebel. i can't possibly bore my friends with this. lagipun they'd probably be all 'bagitaula ape jadi...come on, you know you can trust me'. banyakla semua orang punye trust. dah takde hati nak percaya kat orang lagi dah.
okay bai.
last night
i corrected my head on the pillow. book in my hand, handphone charging beside me. it's been a long time since i last feel completely drowned in a novel. i hate relating to characters, it feels almost as if the author is mocking my life. the handphone beeped twice. i flipped it open. smiled. typed a short goodnight text. don't send out misleading signals, Atiqah. i put my thumb on the C button on the keypad. paused for a second. ego tak habis, kecik sampai besar. pressed the C button and watched the words dissapear. maybe i shouldn't reply. i put my focus back on the book. like a few seconds later, i saw the door open a crack. that must be mama, silently checking on me before she goes to bed. she does that every night, thinking i don't notice her peeking through the door. i can never get my parents. it's easy to believe that they do these things because they love me, but sometimes it feels like distrust. or maybe that is just the ultra-insecure me speaking. i'll never know.
i tried to focus back on the book, but it seemed almost impossible. perhaps i was sleepy. i stared out the ventilation window above the bedroom door. why are the lights still on, mama x tidur lagi ke. then i heard the clicks between the iron and the metal of the ironing board. ohh..gosok baju sekolah Didie and KuZett. i stared at my book. none of the sentences seemed to make any sense anymore. all that my brain registered was the clicking sound of the iron every time mama rests it on the side of the ironing board. i flipped open my handphone and looked at the time. 1.45am. i ignored the guilt i was beginning to feel and stared at the book again.
click.
click.
click.
"Ma, mehla atiq ironkan. Mama gi la tidur. Goodnight ma."
*sengih* "Thank you sayang,"
i tried to focus back on the book, but it seemed almost impossible. perhaps i was sleepy. i stared out the ventilation window above the bedroom door. why are the lights still on, mama x tidur lagi ke. then i heard the clicks between the iron and the metal of the ironing board. ohh..gosok baju sekolah Didie and KuZett. i stared at my book. none of the sentences seemed to make any sense anymore. all that my brain registered was the clicking sound of the iron every time mama rests it on the side of the ironing board. i flipped open my handphone and looked at the time. 1.45am. i ignored the guilt i was beginning to feel and stared at the book again.
click.
click.
click.
"Ma, mehla atiq ironkan. Mama gi la tidur. Goodnight ma."
*sengih* "Thank you sayang,"
Monday, June 23, 2008
pre-rain nostalgia
dear blog,
lately i'm always finding myself feeling like crap. like..not literally crap, but yeah kinda crappy. i think i need to go places, just to loosen up a bit, y'know. but i know dad will count going places as wasting money. ever since he found out about the Bandung plan, he's been talking about saving money. i mean, i know i have to save money. but i'm not going to save all of them. i've always wanted to go somewhere just by myself..but i guess that's too dangerous to do in Malaysia. perhaps i'd do that when i get back to Cork, before class begins. i don't know. i think i'm driving myself mental with the decisions that i make. because i am bad at making them. oh yes i am. so very bad at it.
i'm reading this book Opie's been telling me to read. i think i know the full storyline already (i've only read the first two chapters) but i'll give it a go anyway. such is my love for Opie. i have been slacking off in my duty as a friend, henceforth i shall interpret this feeling as a feeling of loneliness that i have brilliantly bestowed upon myself. the thing is, blog, is that i find friendships rather scary and intimidating. i find people rather scary and intimidating.
okay i guess i have to sign off now, it's getting late.
Staring at the blank page before you
Open up the dirty window
Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find
Reaching for something in the distance
So close you can almost taste it
Release your inhibitions
Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins
The rest is still unwritten
it's heartbreaking, right. the fact that you don't know whats in store for you tomorrow, so you can never brace yourself for them?
awkwardly yours,
Atiq
lately i'm always finding myself feeling like crap. like..not literally crap, but yeah kinda crappy. i think i need to go places, just to loosen up a bit, y'know. but i know dad will count going places as wasting money. ever since he found out about the Bandung plan, he's been talking about saving money. i mean, i know i have to save money. but i'm not going to save all of them. i've always wanted to go somewhere just by myself..but i guess that's too dangerous to do in Malaysia. perhaps i'd do that when i get back to Cork, before class begins. i don't know. i think i'm driving myself mental with the decisions that i make. because i am bad at making them. oh yes i am. so very bad at it.
i'm reading this book Opie's been telling me to read. i think i know the full storyline already (i've only read the first two chapters) but i'll give it a go anyway. such is my love for Opie. i have been slacking off in my duty as a friend, henceforth i shall interpret this feeling as a feeling of loneliness that i have brilliantly bestowed upon myself. the thing is, blog, is that i find friendships rather scary and intimidating. i find people rather scary and intimidating.
okay i guess i have to sign off now, it's getting late.
Staring at the blank page before you
Open up the dirty window
Let the sun illuminate the words that you could not find
Reaching for something in the distance
So close you can almost taste it
Release your inhibitions
Feel the rain on your skin
No one else can feel it for you
Only you can let it in
No one else, no one else
Can speak the words on your lips
Drench yourself in words unspoken
Live your life with arms wide open
Today is where your book begins
The rest is still unwritten
it's heartbreaking, right. the fact that you don't know whats in store for you tomorrow, so you can never brace yourself for them?
awkwardly yours,
Atiq
i have a lot of
posts that i dont like anymore on here, but i suppose i'd keep it for the sake of the memory that it holds. ..or so that i can see whether i've matured throughout the years.
YESTERDAY i went to the bank. there's this pakcik (who works for CIMB i guess, he's wearing a CIMB jacket) who came up to me right when i stepped in, and began doing EVERYTHING for me, he even filled in the forms for me. while he was doing all this, i began to feel a bit offended, thinking that the pakcik must've thought i was a helpless little girl who couldn't do anything herself.
after a while, the makcik bank tells me i have to wait until she calls me, because there were a lot of people applying for ATM cards that day. so i waited obediently..for like..an hour and a half. than she called me and went;
makcik bank : alamak dik..account adik baru reactivate balik hari ni..so takleh buat card lagi..esok baru boleh..sorryyy buat adik tunggu
atiq : haa..nape tak cakap awal-awal..sejam setengah dah tau saya tunggu
makcik bank : sorry dik..esok adik datang, akak buat adik punya mula-mulaa sekali, k?
atiq : mm, okay. takpe, nak buat macam mane.
and then i walked out to see ayahnda beside his Wira; the car won't start. great. as we were waiting for Abe Mizi to come and help, i saw the pakcik bank again.
atiq : pacikk...keta tanak start.
pakcik bank : hahh? ye ke? *goes off to find help*
atiq : alamak *didn't expect him to, saje je ngengade*
a while later, when the pakcik came back
atiq : pacikk...takpe2, orang dah datang tolong
pakcik bank : ohh..ye ke. kena belanja pakcik makan la kalau cantu.
atiq : err...hah?
pakcik bank : belanjaaa
atiq : belanja? errr
pakcik bank : bile nak belanja?
atiq : err..saye belanja pakcik..dengan care..saye..akan menggunakan khidmat CIMB dengan lebih maju jaya!! (i swear i said that, haha)
pakcik bank : haa...bagus bagus!
LOL. i can't believe he went along with it. i kinda expected a frown or something.
ooh. i've finally made peace with this friend i've been disliking for quite a few years for things she apparently didn't even do. it was more because i got a bit defensive for things i thought she said about my then-boyfriend. as i've broken up with the then-boyfriend for quite some time now, i figured i should talk things out with her. it's a massive relief. and i haven't talked to her in so long, i forgot that she's actually quite nice.
and update of sorts;
i've finally fully unpacked everything in the two suitcases. found stuff i didn't even remember bringing back, which was nice. called Kak Filah who's currently here in Kelate with beloved husband. started doing Neuroanatomy notes for next year. went out with a few friends. got so anxious that my sisters are sitting for their mid-year exams for no apparent reason. oh my God this entry is so boring.
Kak Na, if you're reading this, i have Ireland magnets for you :)
YESTERDAY i went to the bank. there's this pakcik (who works for CIMB i guess, he's wearing a CIMB jacket) who came up to me right when i stepped in, and began doing EVERYTHING for me, he even filled in the forms for me. while he was doing all this, i began to feel a bit offended, thinking that the pakcik must've thought i was a helpless little girl who couldn't do anything herself.
after a while, the makcik bank tells me i have to wait until she calls me, because there were a lot of people applying for ATM cards that day. so i waited obediently..for like..an hour and a half. than she called me and went;
makcik bank : alamak dik..account adik baru reactivate balik hari ni..so takleh buat card lagi..esok baru boleh..sorryyy buat adik tunggu
atiq : haa..nape tak cakap awal-awal..sejam setengah dah tau saya tunggu
makcik bank : sorry dik..esok adik datang, akak buat adik punya mula-mulaa sekali, k?
atiq : mm, okay. takpe, nak buat macam mane.
and then i walked out to see ayahnda beside his Wira; the car won't start. great. as we were waiting for Abe Mizi to come and help, i saw the pakcik bank again.
atiq : pacikk...keta tanak start.
pakcik bank : hahh? ye ke? *goes off to find help*
atiq : alamak *didn't expect him to, saje je ngengade*
a while later, when the pakcik came back
atiq : pacikk...takpe2, orang dah datang tolong
pakcik bank : ohh..ye ke. kena belanja pakcik makan la kalau cantu.
atiq : err...hah?
pakcik bank : belanjaaa
atiq : belanja? errr
pakcik bank : bile nak belanja?
atiq : err..saye belanja pakcik..dengan care..saye..akan menggunakan khidmat CIMB dengan lebih maju jaya!! (i swear i said that, haha)
pakcik bank : haa...bagus bagus!
LOL. i can't believe he went along with it. i kinda expected a frown or something.
ooh. i've finally made peace with this friend i've been disliking for quite a few years for things she apparently didn't even do. it was more because i got a bit defensive for things i thought she said about my then-boyfriend. as i've broken up with the then-boyfriend for quite some time now, i figured i should talk things out with her. it's a massive relief. and i haven't talked to her in so long, i forgot that she's actually quite nice.
and update of sorts;
i've finally fully unpacked everything in the two suitcases. found stuff i didn't even remember bringing back, which was nice. called Kak Filah who's currently here in Kelate with beloved husband. started doing Neuroanatomy notes for next year. went out with a few friends. got so anxious that my sisters are sitting for their mid-year exams for no apparent reason. oh my God this entry is so boring.
Kak Na, if you're reading this, i have Ireland magnets for you :)
Saturday, June 21, 2008
Deleted
this is, like...the third...fourth..friend that i realized have deleted me from his/her friends list on friendster. it bothers me because, you know, deleting one from your friendster won't affect your life much, the way deleting/blocking a person from your YM or Skype or your phone can. the only thing that you can achieve by doing this is blocking the person from viewing your pictures. and i'm no picture stealer or anything like that, so there's no reason a person wouldn't want me to see their pictures apart from sheer hatred...right? i mean, i can't think of anything else other than that. enlighten me, dear ex-friendsterfriends. how have i offended you so, that you decided to cut me off your friends list?
i wish these ex-friendsterfriends were the ones that send out those 'OMG FRIENDSTER IS CLOSING SOON' forwarded messages that were circulated like three years ago, but nope. they're the ones that kinda matters.
it's mind boggling. i say things that are not meant to be hurtful, but it ALWAYS sound hurtful in people's ears. i think i've said this so many times before, but i'll say it again: i have zilch communication skillz.
future patient : so..what's going on with my dad, doctor?
future dr. Atiq : his kidneys are pretty much useless, sorry ar bro. dialysis lapan ribu sebulan starting next week. ok next patient, please! lapar ni.
..just kidding.
(i haven't even learned about the renal system yet...go easy on me)
i wish these ex-friendsterfriends were the ones that send out those 'OMG FRIENDSTER IS CLOSING SOON' forwarded messages that were circulated like three years ago, but nope. they're the ones that kinda matters.
it's mind boggling. i say things that are not meant to be hurtful, but it ALWAYS sound hurtful in people's ears. i think i've said this so many times before, but i'll say it again: i have zilch communication skillz.
future patient : so..what's going on with my dad, doctor?
future dr. Atiq : his kidneys are pretty much useless, sorry ar bro. dialysis lapan ribu sebulan starting next week. ok next patient, please! lapar ni.
..just kidding.
(i haven't even learned about the renal system yet...go easy on me)
it rained last night
it was pretty intense; huge droplets of them thumping on the windows, flashes of lightning, thunderous roars, leaking roof, furious wind - i loved it.
the rain in Malaysia is much more exciting than the rain is Ireland.
i love rainy days in Malaysia because they're gorgeous.
i hate rainy days (also known as every days) in Ireland because it'll get really cold and i'd be drippin wet by the time i get to class. and they'd have air-conditioning in the lecture hall and i'd feel pretty much murderous.
i suddenly feel a strong longing to go to Rome. hope i can go there next year. please please.
do you also hate that feeling before you sleep, when you just have to call someone, anyone, to say goodnight to, but you know none of your someones, or anyones, would understand and appreciate the value of a simple goodnight and innocent chat as much as you do? or appreciate the value of the sisterly stories of the day you just have to tell them? musang is the only one who'd ever get me. ever, ever. but now musang is no more. sigh.
the rain in Malaysia is much more exciting than the rain is Ireland.
i love rainy days in Malaysia because they're gorgeous.
i hate rainy days (also known as every days) in Ireland because it'll get really cold and i'd be drippin wet by the time i get to class. and they'd have air-conditioning in the lecture hall and i'd feel pretty much murderous.
i suddenly feel a strong longing to go to Rome. hope i can go there next year. please please.
do you also hate that feeling before you sleep, when you just have to call someone, anyone, to say goodnight to, but you know none of your someones, or anyones, would understand and appreciate the value of a simple goodnight and innocent chat as much as you do? or appreciate the value of the sisterly stories of the day you just have to tell them? musang is the only one who'd ever get me. ever, ever. but now musang is no more. sigh.
Thursday, June 19, 2008
p.s.
i always feel weirded out when people who rarely talk to me IRL suddenly adds me on YM and decides to have a chat with me. i tend to think they hated me or something. but it's always a pleasant surprise :)
crazy urge to blog
lately i find myself filtering what i write on my blog...i'm not quite sure why. it's probably because i'm safeguarding certain things from certain people, etcetera. but now i think this would totally beat the whole point of having a blog, right? it's a diary so i should be able to write what i want. but people will judge. and handling people judging me is not really something i look forward to.
Opie called, telling me she's stressed out from all the studying, and basically freaking out, telling me she wants to go overseas too. whatever is going on with our living system, everyone is being either 1. a studying robot or 2. a working robot. it's depressing. i kept on convincing Opie that she's a million times smarter than i am so she obviously is capable of getting SPM results as good as, or even better than, my results. i pretty much suck at school, i only get a maximum of 5 As when i was in mrsmpc, and i regularly fail Physics and Add Maths. but i studied my brain off during the final three months, so i guess that helped a bit. i still can't believe i got 8 As for my SPM though, the scales must have been rock bottom. even so, with 8 As, i probably was the one with the worst SPM results in KMB back then. anyone who didn't get 9 As get 10As over there. freaking nerdheads.
i went out today. it was half adorable, half disastrous. that is all i have to say about that one.
KuZett beat me at osom twice. TWICE. grrrr. i ALWAYS win at osom! HOW can she be so good at it??
i had gulai ketam and udang goreng and ikan singgang (lol, does that word even exist in standard Malay?) for dinner, it was lush ^.^
i'm going out with the Jaa tomorrow. yeay for friends with cars at their disposal :p
the Jaa is a very small person with a very loud voice, i think she's related to Pikachu.
i wonder whether Ayahnda would let me out tomorrow, seeing that i've already went out today.
this blog doesn't really make much sense. gomenasai.
musang, when is your summer break? i want to know. and i want to know whether you're reading this.
Opie called, telling me she's stressed out from all the studying, and basically freaking out, telling me she wants to go overseas too. whatever is going on with our living system, everyone is being either 1. a studying robot or 2. a working robot. it's depressing. i kept on convincing Opie that she's a million times smarter than i am so she obviously is capable of getting SPM results as good as, or even better than, my results. i pretty much suck at school, i only get a maximum of 5 As when i was in mrsmpc, and i regularly fail Physics and Add Maths. but i studied my brain off during the final three months, so i guess that helped a bit. i still can't believe i got 8 As for my SPM though, the scales must have been rock bottom. even so, with 8 As, i probably was the one with the worst SPM results in KMB back then. anyone who didn't get 9 As get 10As over there. freaking nerdheads.
i went out today. it was half adorable, half disastrous. that is all i have to say about that one.
KuZett beat me at osom twice. TWICE. grrrr. i ALWAYS win at osom! HOW can she be so good at it??
i had gulai ketam and udang goreng and ikan singgang (lol, does that word even exist in standard Malay?) for dinner, it was lush ^.^
i'm going out with the Jaa tomorrow. yeay for friends with cars at their disposal :p
the Jaa is a very small person with a very loud voice, i think she's related to Pikachu.
i wonder whether Ayahnda would let me out tomorrow, seeing that i've already went out today.
this blog doesn't really make much sense. gomenasai.
musang, when is your summer break? i want to know. and i want to know whether you're reading this.
whoops
i've been blogging to Irish date and time since i got back, baru perasan.
dah betulkan dah!
(nobody give two hoots about this apart from myself..i know, i know.)
dah betulkan dah!
(nobody give two hoots about this apart from myself..i know, i know.)
she has to know
Derek : What? You’re all I ever wanted. You’re beautiful!
Odette : Thank you. But what else?
Derek : What else?!
Odette : Is beauty all that matters to you?
Derek : I, uh… What else is there?
King William : I – I just don’t understand… What else did you want him to say?
Odette : I need to know that he loves me for just being me.
she needs to know that you know that she is more than just a pretty face. and she needs to know that you appreciate that fact. it really ain't so complicated~
Odette : Thank you. But what else?
Derek : What else?!
Odette : Is beauty all that matters to you?
Derek : I, uh… What else is there?
King William : I – I just don’t understand… What else did you want him to say?
Odette : I need to know that he loves me for just being me.
an excerpt from: The Swan Princess
she needs to know that you know that she is more than just a pretty face. and she needs to know that you appreciate that fact. it really ain't so complicated~
hmm.
it's sad when boys use the same trick every time. you can see right through their brainless words.
urgh. i feel so disgusted.
to boys who produce words using their brains, sorry i'm generalizing.
i think it's about time i fully unpack my thingamajics and uncover the endless wonder in the two overweight suitcases i brought back.
haih...semaknye.
urgh. i feel so disgusted.
to boys who produce words using their brains, sorry i'm generalizing.
i think it's about time i fully unpack my thingamajics and uncover the endless wonder in the two overweight suitcases i brought back.
haih...semaknye.
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
oh dear
i miscalculated the malaysia-ireland time difference (AGAIN) and called encik Kamis (MARA officer) at 7am Ireland. i didn't realize it until i called him again at 8am, thinking it was 9am, and he calmly said he has to wait until office hour begins to call UCC. and i was like,
'hah, alamak! saya call cik pukul berapa tadi?? mintak maaf cik!!'
atiqah, atiqah.
the definition of gelabah. dulu, kini, dan selamanya.
pray that my results would turn out good once they let me see it..?
-atiq
'hah, alamak! saya call cik pukul berapa tadi?? mintak maaf cik!!'
atiqah, atiqah.
the definition of gelabah. dulu, kini, dan selamanya.
pray that my results would turn out good once they let me see it..?
-atiq
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
going crazy
my results are withheld. WITHHELD. because there are outstanding fees. OUTSTANDING FEES. ZOMG.
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
hfwp3ht932pn,r320hrwkflnsa
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
hfwp3ht932pn,r320hrwkflnsa
Monday, June 16, 2008
home.
salam wbt :)
a LOT of things happened. bad ones and good ones and funny ones and sweet ones and stuff. but i'm now feeling icky so i'm blogging half-heartedly. i'm always feeling icky lately because i'm only just re-adjusting to the weather of the microwave country, so i'm sweaty all the way, eww. i shower even at, like, 3 or 4 in the morning if i suddenly wake up because i'd feel icky and can't go back to sleep. ergh. annoyyingg.
i attempted to hafal my new phone number but failed miserably.
have a huge bad news i've been delaying to type over here. sigh.
it's, uhm. it's Tokku - he has lung cancer. yeap.
he's been diagnosed with it for more than 4 months now, but he didn't want me to know until i got back. now everything makes total sense. mom asking me to come back with the excuse that Tokku's 'not feeling well', Tokku not calling me all the time the way he used to (he calls directly from his handphone so his calls are expensive; he can't afford to waste money like that anymore i guess, his medication costs a whopping RM300 per pill)..etc etc. i don't really wanna talk about it, it feels weird. thank you for explaining cancer stage 2b for me and listening to my senseless blabbering. <3
Tok Ayah on the other hand looks better than he sounded on the phone; he's feeling a lot better, too, and that makes me happy.
went to ZS to see the two little buggers as soon as i reach Kelate. i didn't wait till they get back from school because they're not coming back until 4.30. and oh my god Didie is almost my height already. and KuZett is slightly taller than my chin. they grow up so fast. i really don't want them to grow up - mentally and physically, hehe. the next time i come back, Didie's going to be taller than i am and KuZett's going to be at least my height. lol. it happened with Opie last time, it's going to happen again. in a few years time i'll officially be the shortest in the family. adeyh.
my kampung looks so different now.
a LOT of things happened. bad ones and good ones and funny ones and sweet ones and stuff. but i'm now feeling icky so i'm blogging half-heartedly. i'm always feeling icky lately because i'm only just re-adjusting to the weather of the microwave country, so i'm sweaty all the way, eww. i shower even at, like, 3 or 4 in the morning if i suddenly wake up because i'd feel icky and can't go back to sleep. ergh. annoyyingg.
i attempted to hafal my new phone number but failed miserably.
have a huge bad news i've been delaying to type over here. sigh.
it's, uhm. it's Tokku - he has lung cancer. yeap.
he's been diagnosed with it for more than 4 months now, but he didn't want me to know until i got back. now everything makes total sense. mom asking me to come back with the excuse that Tokku's 'not feeling well', Tokku not calling me all the time the way he used to (he calls directly from his handphone so his calls are expensive; he can't afford to waste money like that anymore i guess, his medication costs a whopping RM300 per pill)..etc etc. i don't really wanna talk about it, it feels weird. thank you for explaining cancer stage 2b for me and listening to my senseless blabbering. <3
Tok Ayah on the other hand looks better than he sounded on the phone; he's feeling a lot better, too, and that makes me happy.
went to ZS to see the two little buggers as soon as i reach Kelate. i didn't wait till they get back from school because they're not coming back until 4.30. and oh my god Didie is almost my height already. and KuZett is slightly taller than my chin. they grow up so fast. i really don't want them to grow up - mentally and physically, hehe. the next time i come back, Didie's going to be taller than i am and KuZett's going to be at least my height. lol. it happened with Opie last time, it's going to happen again. in a few years time i'll officially be the shortest in the family. adeyh.
my kampung looks so different now.
Friday, June 13, 2008
of serendipity and Teater P. Ramlee
i'm home, at long last :)
have been spending time with Kakwe, Awah and Kakak in the new house in Bukit Raja for the last three days, and the house doesn't have internet which shall explain why i've been senyap. i'm typing this in Kakwe's office..she decided to let me come after i said i feel weird being cut off from the netz. i'm using Kakwe's second number but i don't even know what number that is, so i can't give it out to everyone just yet, except for Amin and Dayah. which brings us to the main topic of this blog.
i woke up early yesterday for a change, after major jetlagging the two days before (i woke up at 3pm!) so Kakwe made plans for the day and i simply tagged along. i thought we're just going to go watch Hulk (Kakwe really wants to see that movie, for some reason) and go buy tudung at PKNS, so i dress accordingly. i told Kakwe that we probably are going to bump into Amin or something when we were at Cineleisure coz it's so close to his house, and i don't really remember how the conversation flow went when i told her that i went to watch the first Narnia with Amin (these points will have a relevance later on, i promise).
when we were in the movie theatre, Kakak called to say she got free tickets to Teater P. Ramlee and she's taking me there. it crossed my mind that i'm going to look out of place at Istana Budaya with my faded Rocketdogs and green checked dress, but i let it pass, thinking nobody there would know me anyway. kalau senang nak tukar baju, i would have, tapi since kakak dah on the way, malas nak semangat sangat fikir a way to get back home and change.
so i said goodbye to Kakwe and hopped on to Kakak's Persona. she was membebeling about how cute this guy she met earlier that day is for as long as the drive from Cineleisure to Istana Budaya, lol. and kutuking my dress too, naturally. wow, you would've thought i'm already immune to that already, after all these years. but yeah...i thought that dress looked like an apron too, when i first tried it on, but it's sooo comfortable that i decided not to care. kwang3.
anyway as we drove into the parking lot i saw this very familiar tall (i hate you) figure walking by the side walk and noticed almost immediately that it was Amin even though i didn't really see his face. i was really happy to see him at first because i haven't seen the bugger in a long time, but then i realized that he's all dressed up, and i screamed 'Ahhh!! Amin hensem!!' by reflex. NOT because i suddenly had an epiphany that Amin's good looking, BUT because i'm not dressed up and i KNOW i'm gonna hear it from Amin that i'm wearing an apron to Istana Budaya. cis.
when i went up to him and asked him who he came with and got the answer, i just go OH-MY-GOD NO WAY.
lol. dunia ini kecil, yes? :) (I DO NOT NEED EXTRA GROWTH HORMONES :P)
and later on Amin told me Dayah was there, too. can you believe it? Dayah, kau pegi mane by the way, tak sempat say goodbye!
Kakwe (upon finding out that i met Amin) : tu la, sebut-sebut lagi namo dio. key muncul sungguh doh.
(lol)
the show was good, but i got distracted and peeked at the musicians during certain scenes when the music was really nice because we sat at the very front row so we were right above the musicians.
guess who gave us free tickets to the show?
the evil doctor who was temporarily appointed as king of Indrapura in Sindarela. he's Kakak's friend, apparently.
i hate that character so much, lol.
there was way too much coincidences last night :)
p.s. NO apron dress picture for you people :p
have been spending time with Kakwe, Awah and Kakak in the new house in Bukit Raja for the last three days, and the house doesn't have internet which shall explain why i've been senyap. i'm typing this in Kakwe's office..she decided to let me come after i said i feel weird being cut off from the netz. i'm using Kakwe's second number but i don't even know what number that is, so i can't give it out to everyone just yet, except for Amin and Dayah. which brings us to the main topic of this blog.
i woke up early yesterday for a change, after major jetlagging the two days before (i woke up at 3pm!) so Kakwe made plans for the day and i simply tagged along. i thought we're just going to go watch Hulk (Kakwe really wants to see that movie, for some reason) and go buy tudung at PKNS, so i dress accordingly. i told Kakwe that we probably are going to bump into Amin or something when we were at Cineleisure coz it's so close to his house, and i don't really remember how the conversation flow went when i told her that i went to watch the first Narnia with Amin (these points will have a relevance later on, i promise).
when we were in the movie theatre, Kakak called to say she got free tickets to Teater P. Ramlee and she's taking me there. it crossed my mind that i'm going to look out of place at Istana Budaya with my faded Rocketdogs and green checked dress, but i let it pass, thinking nobody there would know me anyway. kalau senang nak tukar baju, i would have, tapi since kakak dah on the way, malas nak semangat sangat fikir a way to get back home and change.
so i said goodbye to Kakwe and hopped on to Kakak's Persona. she was membebeling about how cute this guy she met earlier that day is for as long as the drive from Cineleisure to Istana Budaya, lol. and kutuking my dress too, naturally. wow, you would've thought i'm already immune to that already, after all these years. but yeah...i thought that dress looked like an apron too, when i first tried it on, but it's sooo comfortable that i decided not to care. kwang3.
anyway as we drove into the parking lot i saw this very familiar tall (i hate you) figure walking by the side walk and noticed almost immediately that it was Amin even though i didn't really see his face. i was really happy to see him at first because i haven't seen the bugger in a long time, but then i realized that he's all dressed up, and i screamed 'Ahhh!! Amin hensem!!' by reflex. NOT because i suddenly had an epiphany that Amin's good looking, BUT because i'm not dressed up and i KNOW i'm gonna hear it from Amin that i'm wearing an apron to Istana Budaya. cis.
when i went up to him and asked him who he came with and got the answer, i just go OH-MY-GOD NO WAY.
lol. dunia ini kecil, yes? :) (I DO NOT NEED EXTRA GROWTH HORMONES :P)
and later on Amin told me Dayah was there, too. can you believe it? Dayah, kau pegi mane by the way, tak sempat say goodbye!
Kakwe (upon finding out that i met Amin) : tu la, sebut-sebut lagi namo dio. key muncul sungguh doh.
(lol)
the show was good, but i got distracted and peeked at the musicians during certain scenes when the music was really nice because we sat at the very front row so we were right above the musicians.
guess who gave us free tickets to the show?
the evil doctor who was temporarily appointed as king of Indrapura in Sindarela. he's Kakak's friend, apparently.
i hate that character so much, lol.
there was way too much coincidences last night :)
p.s. NO apron dress picture for you people :p
Sunday, June 8, 2008
Summer Camp EIRE 08: An Experience
take a deep breath; this is going to be a long one with unnecessary details all over it.
i just got back from camping out for 5 days; despite the sunburned and peeling face and lips, sore legs and a throbbing toe, i am feeling amazingly swell :)
it was my first time in Northern Ireland (it's part of the UK, thus is a separate entity from the Republic of Ireland), so i was pretty excited. i was Kak Sya's co-driver so i stayed awake for the most of the approximately 5 hour drive. Cork is waaayy down south making the journey quite a long one, but with drivers like Kak Sya and Kak Di (kitorang convoy dua kereta), we managed to reach there quite early biiznillah. as we were entering the north, its difference from the south became more and more apparent; especially the English-like houses and the yellow car plate numbers. it felt really foreign to me.
the location is Tollymore Forest Park, County Down, Northern Ireland. when we finally reached there and stopped at the ranger's booth, we found out that despite being furthest from the place, we were the very first ones to reach there. the camping site was this huuuugggeee field surrounded by tall trees and mountains; the place is gorgeous. after checking out the nearby forests and figuring out some glitches, we began setting up the tents, which is an addictive task, i must say.
after we got that one done and over with, we decided to venture through the forest to take a peek at the river. i really, really, like the forests there, they're very pretty. it's a different kind of pretty from tropical forests though. here, have a look.
i can babble on forever if i am to write about what happened during those 5 days, but here are the highlights;
The Tent
they arranged the participants according to our tempat asal so that we can get to know each other and maybe meet up during ur summer break, so naturally, my khemah is the Pantai Timur one with three Kelantanese ladies; me, Kak Ina and Tihah, one Pahang...ian (?); Kak Faizah, and one nomad member; Kak Di, orang Pantai Timur yang universal (long story). we all got along really well especially me and Tihah (well, we're technically friends since our Naim years), so that contributed a LOT in me having a fantastic time over there :)
Pengisian Dikala Hujan
seperti yang diramalkan oleh Yahoo! Weather, dua daripada lima hari tu hujan..since agak impossible untuk program dihentikan terus everytime it rains (forgive the sudden rojakness), sessi pengisian diteruskan jugak walaupun hujan masa tu agak lebat..tapi takdela buat kat tanah lapang, it was held in the middle of the forest untuk mengurangkan siket kebasahan yang terjadi~ and masyaAllah, masa tu Atiq kagum sangat-sangat-SANGAT. why, you may ask? because NOBODY complained, and NOBODY ponteng or stayed back in the tent, walaupun takde orang paksa pun untuk keluar dengar pengisian tu. sejuk sungguh hati berada dikalangan orang-orang yang soleh. semua orang redha je stokin lencun seluar lencun..bila dah tak tahan duduk sebab basah, ada yang berdiri...tapi yang penting, nobody complained; i really can't get over that fact. it's just amazing.
Gadget-making
i've only camped out once before, so when the camp commander mentioned there we're going into the forest to collect some wood to make gadgets, i had no idea what she meant by 'gadgets'. later on, i found out that 'gadgets' = ampaian, tempat letak pinggan, meja, etc. oh, and also a panji for each kabilah.
War Game
for this activity, the small groups are mashed up into two big groups according to the arrangement of the tents. our group won both pre-war immunities; extra water balloons and flour. we wondered for a while of whether we should use the flour to track our paths back to our base once we found the opponent's base (it was pitch black in the forest, we played from around 11.30pm to 2.45am), but we decided against it in fear of the opponents using it to track our base. atiq kena jadi attacker. rasa takut jugak masa tu. bukan takut hantu atau takut gelap atau takut hutan (i would have if this took place in Malaysia), tapi takut nak perang. pantang nampak flashlight sikit, cuak musuh datang. terfikir betapa gerunnya pejuang-pejuang yang betul-betul diuji Allah dengan jihad pedang. fuhh. takot.
kelakar jugak in a way sebab kitorang takut nak guna flashlight takut team lawan nampak, tapi kitorang kena guna jugak sebab tak nampak jalan. hasilnye, beberapa kali jugak la suluh2 kat depan, ada semak depan mata hehe. naseb baik tak terlanggau. ade sekali tu siap kaki tengah langkah pokok yang sangat besar pastu takleh gerak sebab sekeliling penuh dengan dahan haha. adoiila. lepas tu ada sekali tu, empat orang musuh ade nyorok kat pokok depan mate kitorang, tapi by the third suluhan baru kitorang betul2 sure ade orang kat situ. lepas tu, diorang dengan semangatnye jerit "serang!! serang!!", atiq ngan Kak Az punye la berdebar lari nyorok belakang pokok tapi takde pon diorang baling belon keke. adeyh. pastu tibe2 diam and bile kitorang check check, dah ghaib. suluh sekeliling, tak nampak pun semak yang penyek or any other track yang diorang tinggal. by that time, atiq dah start cuak; betul ke diorang yang atiq nampak tadi. huhu. rupenye diorang jatuh longkang, patutlerr tak nampak. ingatkan pakai magic apelar. lulz.
yang paling kelakar sekali, atiq dengan Kak Az sesat sampai terkeluar hutan and kena patah balik ikut padang untuk masuk balik ke warzone, adeyh. and then mase kitorang tengah try nak carik balik base kitorang, kitorang terjumpe base diorang! pastu Kak Aisyah dengan ganasnye peluk atiq, seret ke pokok and belasah atiq dengan sleeping bag yang ade satu belon air yang takmo pecah, hohoho. ganas jugak Kak Aisyah ni. adeyh. sampai atiq jerit 'dah dah, atiq lencun dah ni' baru die stop. aigoo. the game ended when Kak Sya blowed the whistle twice. nobody won because we both had too many defenders, and both sides' attackers 'died' early in the game.
Hiking/Mountaineering (in which Atiq recited The Road Not Taken by Robert Frost way too many times than is necessary)
for this one, the Pantai Timur group digabungkan dengan group Perak, and we dubbed ourselves 'Karak'.
this was the major one for me. i had NEVER been so close to the mountains apart from when i was on the highways. i was looking forward to this one the most and Alhamdulillah, i survived it. the first ever mountain i conquered; Slieve Donard, 849 m (2,786 ft), the highest peak in Northern Ireland.
the journey from Tollymore to the kaki bukit itself was already challenging, partly because it's rocky and partly because one of my toes hurt from having a metal chair bang on it the night before, so i can't land my right feet properly. we were walking along this gorgeous stream all that while, and the view was spectacular - only at that time i couldn't find my camera amidst all the other things in my bag, so i took pictures using Kak Di's camera instead. we drank water from the stream and it was so fresh, it's the first time i've ever (deliberately) drank directly from a stream. it was amazing. all the while i was reminded of one of our ayat hafazans,
Rabbana Ma Khalaqta Haza Batila,
Ya Tuhan kami, tidaklah Engkau ciptakan semua ini sia-sia,
i think untuk orang-orang yang dah biasa mountaineering, the mountain wouldn't have been so hard to climb. but for me, a first timer and a very gayat person, it was quite challenging. at one point during the ascend, everybody was pointing at the gorgeous view below and when i looked, BAM. terus dizzy. i called Kak Aimi who was just a few steps above me to help me, and she came back down and climbed by my side, blocking the view from me. and then Kak Ina took over, and she held my hands and slowed her pace to help me. terharu sangat-sangat masa tu, sangat terasa keikhlasan semua orang...subhanallah...kagum dengan kesolehah-an sisters.
i was SO overwhelmed when i reached the top that i cried and hugged Kak Yan and Mas when i was up there. i don't exactly know why...i was just...speechless. Kagum dan gerun melihat kegagahan gunung-ganang yang akan hancur menjadi debu-debu berterbangan di akhirat nanti...subhanallah. We took our time lepaking on the peak on by the time we finally got up for the descend, it was like, 5.30pm. thank God for Summer. it's bright up until 9.30pm.
we have a member in the group that has an injured leg (but she could still walk), so we had to slow our pace down so she won't be left behind and so that she can have time to rest as well. i didn't mind the situation at all, i was quite happy to enjoy the scenery even longer. the only thing that worried me, and i believe i speak for everyone in the group too, is: nightfall. masa ni pun atiq sangat kagum dengan bi'ah solehah yang wujud. Ya Allah...takde orang moody or cranky langsung! semua orang sangat sabar dan supportive of the sister walaupun by the time kitorang sampai ke Newcastle town, the amount of time that has passed since we first started out was a startling 13 hours!
The End
the program was supposed to end on the 8th, but my flight is on the 9th and i haven't packed anything yet. so I had to say goodbye and leave early; it was heartbreaking to leave before everything was over...i really wanted to stay :(
All in all it was an experience like no other...hopefully tahun depan ade lagi! it's a breath of fresh air from the normal pengisian-dalam-dewan programs (not that i don't like those ones). i might write about random peristiwa-s during the camp later on when i had the time...as for now, i have to go finish packing my stuff!
Malaysia, i'm coming home!
i just got back from camping out for 5 days; despite the sunburned and peeling face and lips, sore legs and a throbbing toe, i am feeling amazingly swell :)
it was my first time in Northern Ireland (it's part of the UK, thus is a separate entity from the Republic of Ireland), so i was pretty excited. i was Kak Sya's co-driver so i stayed awake for the most of the approximately 5 hour drive. Cork is waaayy down south making the journey quite a long one, but with drivers like Kak Sya and Kak Di (kitorang convoy dua kereta), we managed to reach there quite early biiznillah. as we were entering the north, its difference from the south became more and more apparent; especially the English-like houses and the yellow car plate numbers. it felt really foreign to me.
the location is Tollymore Forest Park, County Down, Northern Ireland. when we finally reached there and stopped at the ranger's booth, we found out that despite being furthest from the place, we were the very first ones to reach there. the camping site was this huuuugggeee field surrounded by tall trees and mountains; the place is gorgeous. after checking out the nearby forests and figuring out some glitches, we began setting up the tents, which is an addictive task, i must say.
after we got that one done and over with, we decided to venture through the forest to take a peek at the river. i really, really, like the forests there, they're very pretty. it's a different kind of pretty from tropical forests though. here, have a look.
i can babble on forever if i am to write about what happened during those 5 days, but here are the highlights;
The Tent
they arranged the participants according to our tempat asal so that we can get to know each other and maybe meet up during ur summer break, so naturally, my khemah is the Pantai Timur one with three Kelantanese ladies; me, Kak Ina and Tihah, one Pahang...ian (?); Kak Faizah, and one nomad member; Kak Di, orang Pantai Timur yang universal (long story). we all got along really well especially me and Tihah (well, we're technically friends since our Naim years), so that contributed a LOT in me having a fantastic time over there :)
Pengisian Dikala Hujan
seperti yang diramalkan oleh Yahoo! Weather, dua daripada lima hari tu hujan..since agak impossible untuk program dihentikan terus everytime it rains (forgive the sudden rojakness), sessi pengisian diteruskan jugak walaupun hujan masa tu agak lebat..tapi takdela buat kat tanah lapang, it was held in the middle of the forest untuk mengurangkan siket kebasahan yang terjadi~ and masyaAllah, masa tu Atiq kagum sangat-sangat-SANGAT. why, you may ask? because NOBODY complained, and NOBODY ponteng or stayed back in the tent, walaupun takde orang paksa pun untuk keluar dengar pengisian tu. sejuk sungguh hati berada dikalangan orang-orang yang soleh. semua orang redha je stokin lencun seluar lencun..bila dah tak tahan duduk sebab basah, ada yang berdiri...tapi yang penting, nobody complained; i really can't get over that fact. it's just amazing.
Gadget-making
i've only camped out once before, so when the camp commander mentioned there we're going into the forest to collect some wood to make gadgets, i had no idea what she meant by 'gadgets'. later on, i found out that 'gadgets' = ampaian, tempat letak pinggan, meja, etc. oh, and also a panji for each kabilah.
War Game
for this activity, the small groups are mashed up into two big groups according to the arrangement of the tents. our group won both pre-war immunities; extra water balloons and flour. we wondered for a while of whether we should use the flour to track our paths back to our base once we found the opponent's base (it was pitch black in the forest, we played from around 11.30pm to 2.45am), but we decided against it in fear of the opponents using it to track our base. atiq kena jadi attacker. rasa takut jugak masa tu. bukan takut hantu atau takut gelap atau takut hutan (i would have if this took place in Malaysia), tapi takut nak perang. pantang nampak flashlight sikit, cuak musuh datang. terfikir betapa gerunnya pejuang-pejuang yang betul-betul diuji Allah dengan jihad pedang. fuhh. takot.
kelakar jugak in a way sebab kitorang takut nak guna flashlight takut team lawan nampak, tapi kitorang kena guna jugak sebab tak nampak jalan. hasilnye, beberapa kali jugak la suluh2 kat depan, ada semak depan mata hehe. naseb baik tak terlanggau. ade sekali tu siap kaki tengah langkah pokok yang sangat besar pastu takleh gerak sebab sekeliling penuh dengan dahan haha. adoiila. lepas tu ada sekali tu, empat orang musuh ade nyorok kat pokok depan mate kitorang, tapi by the third suluhan baru kitorang betul2 sure ade orang kat situ. lepas tu, diorang dengan semangatnye jerit "serang!! serang!!", atiq ngan Kak Az punye la berdebar lari nyorok belakang pokok tapi takde pon diorang baling belon keke. adeyh. pastu tibe2 diam and bile kitorang check check, dah ghaib. suluh sekeliling, tak nampak pun semak yang penyek or any other track yang diorang tinggal. by that time, atiq dah start cuak; betul ke diorang yang atiq nampak tadi. huhu. rupenye diorang jatuh longkang, patutlerr tak nampak. ingatkan pakai magic apelar. lulz.
yang paling kelakar sekali, atiq dengan Kak Az sesat sampai terkeluar hutan and kena patah balik ikut padang untuk masuk balik ke warzone, adeyh. and then mase kitorang tengah try nak carik balik base kitorang, kitorang terjumpe base diorang! pastu Kak Aisyah dengan ganasnye peluk atiq, seret ke pokok and belasah atiq dengan sleeping bag yang ade satu belon air yang takmo pecah, hohoho. ganas jugak Kak Aisyah ni. adeyh. sampai atiq jerit 'dah dah, atiq lencun dah ni' baru die stop. aigoo. the game ended when Kak Sya blowed the whistle twice. nobody won because we both had too many defenders, and both sides' attackers 'died' early in the game.
Hiking/Mountaineering (in which Atiq recited The Road Not Taken by Robert Frost way too many times than is necessary)
for this one, the Pantai Timur group digabungkan dengan group Perak, and we dubbed ourselves 'Karak'.
this was the major one for me. i had NEVER been so close to the mountains apart from when i was on the highways. i was looking forward to this one the most and Alhamdulillah, i survived it. the first ever mountain i conquered; Slieve Donard, 849 m (2,786 ft), the highest peak in Northern Ireland.
the journey from Tollymore to the kaki bukit itself was already challenging, partly because it's rocky and partly because one of my toes hurt from having a metal chair bang on it the night before, so i can't land my right feet properly. we were walking along this gorgeous stream all that while, and the view was spectacular - only at that time i couldn't find my camera amidst all the other things in my bag, so i took pictures using Kak Di's camera instead. we drank water from the stream and it was so fresh, it's the first time i've ever (deliberately) drank directly from a stream. it was amazing. all the while i was reminded of one of our ayat hafazans,
Rabbana Ma Khalaqta Haza Batila,
Ya Tuhan kami, tidaklah Engkau ciptakan semua ini sia-sia,
i think untuk orang-orang yang dah biasa mountaineering, the mountain wouldn't have been so hard to climb. but for me, a first timer and a very gayat person, it was quite challenging. at one point during the ascend, everybody was pointing at the gorgeous view below and when i looked, BAM. terus dizzy. i called Kak Aimi who was just a few steps above me to help me, and she came back down and climbed by my side, blocking the view from me. and then Kak Ina took over, and she held my hands and slowed her pace to help me. terharu sangat-sangat masa tu, sangat terasa keikhlasan semua orang...subhanallah...kagum dengan kesolehah-an sisters.
i was SO overwhelmed when i reached the top that i cried and hugged Kak Yan and Mas when i was up there. i don't exactly know why...i was just...speechless. Kagum dan gerun melihat kegagahan gunung-ganang yang akan hancur menjadi debu-debu berterbangan di akhirat nanti...subhanallah. We took our time lepaking on the peak on by the time we finally got up for the descend, it was like, 5.30pm. thank God for Summer. it's bright up until 9.30pm.
we have a member in the group that has an injured leg (but she could still walk), so we had to slow our pace down so she won't be left behind and so that she can have time to rest as well. i didn't mind the situation at all, i was quite happy to enjoy the scenery even longer. the only thing that worried me, and i believe i speak for everyone in the group too, is: nightfall. masa ni pun atiq sangat kagum dengan bi'ah solehah yang wujud. Ya Allah...takde orang moody or cranky langsung! semua orang sangat sabar dan supportive of the sister walaupun by the time kitorang sampai ke Newcastle town, the amount of time that has passed since we first started out was a startling 13 hours!
The End
the program was supposed to end on the 8th, but my flight is on the 9th and i haven't packed anything yet. so I had to say goodbye and leave early; it was heartbreaking to leave before everything was over...i really wanted to stay :(
All in all it was an experience like no other...hopefully tahun depan ade lagi! it's a breath of fresh air from the normal pengisian-dalam-dewan programs (not that i don't like those ones). i might write about random peristiwa-s during the camp later on when i had the time...as for now, i have to go finish packing my stuff!
Malaysia, i'm coming home!
Sunday, June 1, 2008
the (somewhat) eventful night before Niesa went back
it feels different, not having the bugger knock on my door every few hours. she's now well on her way back to Malaysia, i hope everything goes on well.
anyway this blog is about last night. since it's her last night here, we all went to hang out in her room, making a lot of noise and pointing out the food that we think she should just leave for us to finish, and basically bugging her while she packed. Dayah and I were on the bed, watching adorable YouTube videos and cracking up, while Mas is on the floor lost in her own world, listening to her lush iPod Touch while writing good luck cards to her anak-anak usrah (mak usrah yang baek hati). and then some time later Niesa was done packing and joined me and Dayah on the bed (don't ask how the three of us can fit on the single bed), and Dayah passed the laptop to Mas. so Mas is then, again, lost in her own world, surfing the netz, while the rest of us drowned the room in noisy banter and meroyan-ish screams. Mas kept telling us to keep it down cause we might be annoying the neighbours but Dayah kept being noisy anyways, lol. when two degil people come together x.x
and..
quite some time afterwards..
come an unexpected
*crack*
..and then;
*SCREAMS*
yeap. the bed broke.
LOL.
Mas : aku kat bawah...aku kat bawah!! aku tak bersalah!
Niesa : die patah kat side kau baring, atiq!
Me : *sad face* err...sorry....?~
and then, of course, naturally, we then proceeded to my room and ALL FOUR OF US hopped on the bed and start doing random things again (this time Mas isn't only in her own world, she decided to sleep terus. lol.). thank God my bed is not a wooden one, it's a springy, mattressy (double size) kinda bed, so it won't break. haha..adoiiila.
NIESA, WE MISS YOU ALREADY :(
P.S. my prayers go out to dearest Atiq Stabilo who's currently hospitalized for AVM, who was always calling me as his 'name-twin' when we were in KMB. you better get well soon so i can hate* you for being so smart all over again :)
*just kidding
anyway this blog is about last night. since it's her last night here, we all went to hang out in her room, making a lot of noise and pointing out the food that we think she should just leave for us to finish, and basically bugging her while she packed. Dayah and I were on the bed, watching adorable YouTube videos and cracking up, while Mas is on the floor lost in her own world, listening to her lush iPod Touch while writing good luck cards to her anak-anak usrah (mak usrah yang baek hati). and then some time later Niesa was done packing and joined me and Dayah on the bed (don't ask how the three of us can fit on the single bed), and Dayah passed the laptop to Mas. so Mas is then, again, lost in her own world, surfing the netz, while the rest of us drowned the room in noisy banter and meroyan-ish screams. Mas kept telling us to keep it down cause we might be annoying the neighbours but Dayah kept being noisy anyways, lol. when two degil people come together x.x
and..
quite some time afterwards..
come an unexpected
*crack*
..and then;
*SCREAMS*
yeap. the bed broke.
LOL.
Mas : aku kat bawah...aku kat bawah!! aku tak bersalah!
Niesa : die patah kat side kau baring, atiq!
Me : *sad face* err...sorry....?~
and then, of course, naturally, we then proceeded to my room and ALL FOUR OF US hopped on the bed and start doing random things again (this time Mas isn't only in her own world, she decided to sleep terus. lol.). thank God my bed is not a wooden one, it's a springy, mattressy (double size) kinda bed, so it won't break. haha..adoiiila.
NIESA, WE MISS YOU ALREADY :(
P.S. my prayers go out to dearest Atiq Stabilo who's currently hospitalized for AVM, who was always calling me as his 'name-twin' when we were in KMB. you better get well soon so i can hate* you for being so smart all over again :)
*just kidding
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