pictures that paint stories rather half-heartedly

why hello hello.

i always worry Ain by (almost always) sounding depressing in my blog, but i'm alright, really. i just write more when i'm at my lower points in life.

so Ain, if you're reading this, by any chance, don't worry, k? and i miss you, by the way.

so anyway. today i wanna talk about pictures.

i think i've always been the kind of person who wants to be in pictures because i want to have the memory immortalized in print (or, in the case of the modern days, in facebook). but i'm always put off by the throng of friends who like to jump in everyone's pictures...when they start doing the run-to-where-the-camera-is-pointing thing, i will tend to just stay out of the picture.

and i'm also the type who can't stand people who have 50 pictures of their face with 0.2mm's worth of background in their profile picture album. i can't even...just...no.

but, lately i realized that i haven't many pictures of myself looking presentable. my pictures usually look like this


or this

or this


while there's no denying my habit of morphing into a four-year-old when taking a picture, i sometimes take normal ones too, only it usually look like this

or this



or even worse, this


i don't know whether this is just a manifestation of me realizing that i do not photograph very well, or an expression of my insecure-self, or just me being the low profile antisocial geek that i am.

all of these factors make finding pictures of me to, for example, give to the class rep for the year book, a rather difficult task.

very rarely, i will take pictures that end up like this

or this


but these kind of pictures make me feel like head-desking myself towards a lethal brain haemorrhage.

and then, very, very, very, rarely...i'd luck into this

and this


it's a problem that will plague me for the rest of my life.

after all the above rants...i think the picture that represents what i look like every day is this

mata sepet, senyum penat, glasses, white coat and stethoscope.

my name is Atiqah and i'm your average 23 year old girl :)



p.s. writing this entry made me realize the sheer volume of pictures that i lost when my laptop crashed last year.