setiap kali pun taknak balik summer, setiap kali pun plan gagal

next summer's gonna be my last one here. if i go back, there's a chance i might be able to raya at home.

at the same time, i think i need to study to keep up with the game, before i go into final year.

but a LOT of my close friends are planning to get hitched this summer, so i'm going to miss many many weddings.

but i really can't afford to spend 800euros to go back.

i need to be emotionally stable for the rough times of final year, and for that i need to go home and recharge.

but i might need to work in the summer to get some money to be able to pay for rent, bills and food next year.

but i could always ask ayahnda for the money.

but i really don't like the idea of doing that.

but i could always pay him back when i start working.



aaaaaa.

i don't know.

i have to decide now, so i can plan wether my final year project and summer electives will be based here or in Malaysia.

*pening*

Ce matin la/Being a girl (as experienced by Atiqah)

Wakes up.

Waits for roommate to wake up first.

Roommate wakes up and goes to toilet.

Roommate wakes me up.

Sits on bed, thinking this is way too early.

Brushes teeth, washes face, scrubs face once or twice a week, takes wudhu'.

Prays Subuh.

Goes back to sleep.

Wakes up, realize will be late if does not wake up RIGHT NOW.

Wakes up for real.

Shower, shampoo, scrubs body once or twice a week.

Wears lotion on legs.

Wears a different lotion on arms and hands.

Puts olive oil in hair.

Combs hair.

Puts Body Shop Aloe Vera moisturiser on face.

Puts rempit liquid vitamin bought from a random hairdresser in Wakaf Bharu in hair (it smells vunderful).

Uses Dettol medicated powder as deodorant.

Showers neck and body with excessive Dettol medicated powder unnecessarily.

Iron clothes.

Gets dressed.

Wears Clinique Superbalm Moisturising Gloss that was received as a freebie.

Sprays Elizabeth Arden on wrists.

Goes to hospital to see and talk to old people.




I like smelling nice.

xoxo
Atiqah

disconnected

kadang-kadang i do things that are just SO opposite from the way i feel that i worry about my mental health status.

in psychiatry lecture the other day, when the lecturer gave brief anecdotes about several personality disorders? it sent shivers down my spine.

my nickname in mIRC in the olden days? [^split_identity^]

seriously, at 23, i thought i'd have it all figured out. but nope. i'm still learning. still searching for what i really want, for where i stand in the world.

but i've grown and learned a lot, too.

that Getting Past OK book? i slowed down because i started getting slightly pissed off at the author for repeatedly trying to insinuate that religion has a negative impact on people. i finally got over it though. currently on page 59, and picking up pace because i reached the important chapters.

in other news, i really love paediatrics.

(my flow of thought makes no sense)

hearts and kisses
Atiq

diary of a medical student

I was walking down the hospital corridor when I saw Nate up front, though tempted to say 'Hey Dad!' because that's what I affectionately call him due to him being old and balding (haha, I'm so mean!), I ended up just saying

'Hey!' with a small nod.

He threw me a suave look, leaned to my side as he was walking towards me, and held his arm out to me as if he was trying to give me a side-hug. I edged away from his arms and gave a chuckle, and he said,

'That was a high-five!'

I could've sworn he sounded like he wanted to add an '..idiot!' at the back. I just laughed and made a face that hopefully translated to 'whoops sorry, cultural differences!'. But really I think my face translated into 'awkward', in capital letters.

* * *

Since I'm in the same group as Mr. Annoyingface aka JR, I go to small group tutorials with him. Yesterday he found out I was fasting, and at the end of the tutorial he said,

'what are you, playing catch-up Ramadhan?'

*hesitates* 'uhh...yeah. how do you know that?' I said, because Irish people are pretty ignorant when it comes to religion and normal responses to me fasting would be either

'is it Ramadhan?' or 'why?'. so it's quite unusual that he knows I'm qada-ing my puasa. then he said;

'well when I was in first year there's this funny little girl who told me aaaallll about it'

At that moment I couldn't help wondering what the hell was I thinking when I told him about menstruating women skipping their Ramadhan fasting days and having to qada' them later. I mean seriously. What. The. Hell.

* * *

When I was in town the other day, I walked past a little shop that sold secondhand books. The display of the shop caught my attention, but it wasn't the books that did the trick; it was the old records from the 80's. I decided to walk in and check them out, I've always loved independent bookshops. The owners are always old/geeky/eccentric (which basically translates to mega-awesome, in my opinion) and fun to talk to.

I was staring at the gorgeous vintage Billy Murray and Beatles records, wishing I had a phonograph/gramophone to play them at home, when my eyes started drifting towards the old DVD section.

There were a few Agatha Christie Poirot Series DVDs.

Since this was probably Didie's dream come true, I enquired of the DVDs to the shopkeeper.

'She's one of a kind, isn't she,' He said, taking down the DVDs from the upper shelf behind him.

'My sister absolutely adore her,' I said, rather sheepishly, since in all honesty I haven't read any of Agatha Christie's books.

Reading the synopsis at the back of one of the DVDs, I asked 'Which one do you think I should buy for her?'

'Oooh. I'm an EXPERT in Agatha Christie' he said, beaming. He took all three DVDs and frowned his eyebrows, thinking.

'Take this one!'

'Alright, I'll take your word for it,' I said, taking out my purse. He then proceeded to enquire about my hometown and we had a most pleasant conversation which ended with him wishing me good luck, saying he thinks I'd make a great doctor one day.

God I love geeky old people.


xoxo
Atiqah